Katie is the nourishing and loving type of person. My friend picks me up and we make our way to the performances. I am dressed in black tight pants an... a black shirt with my white-blond hair wet off to the side. I have my clear glasses so I can see well and my green earrings and watch that matches my belt clip. Once i get off there my friend and I meet with Katie and we go out around about 20mins for coffee. Katie is dressed in this black top and top punk ruck type of skirt with black boots. If it is, we’ll have to think again.”“In the meantime,” said Jess, morosely, “we have to convince Carol to hang in there for a few more months.”On Saturday evening they called on Carol to take her out for a drink. She looked thoroughly depressed.“John’s written,” she said. “Come in.”She fired up he laptop and found the email.“Here,” she said dully. “Read it.”Jess and Susan read the mail.Dear Carol,I’m writing this on a train, beginning a four month assignment about which I cannot tell anyone. You’ve got to be real with someone at some point, Matt.”What the hell was going on today? First Grant and now Dr. Atkins. Was I really not fooling anyone? Who the hell was this lady to tell me what I’m supposed to feel? It was at that point that I thought she deserved a dose of realism.“You want real?” I snorted. “I loved my wife. She was everything. She was my life. She’s gone and I’ve got to live with that. I don’t need you or anyone else feeling bad or sorry for me. Shitty things. Making my way there through the number of people, I stood in front of the sink filling my hands with water. I splashed it on my face then looked at my hands. They were shaking hard because I was so nervous. I cleaned the water off my face and took a couple deep breaths. Feeling better about myself, I exited and found Jessica sitting at the table. I pulled a chair next to hers and sat down. “I’m sorry I am bad about this sort of thing,” I said to her. “I know,” she said quietly. I took her hand.
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