Eventually my goal hove into reach and I was about to push the door open when a hand was firmly placed on my shoulder and a gruff, alcohol infused voi...e shouted, "Not in there, luv - your's is down there a bit!"'Shit!' I suddenly thought to myself as realisation set in - I'd been about to enter the gents! What had I been thinking about? I smiled up at the bleary eyed man with the huge beer belly and muttered my thanks before heading off towards the ladies. For a good minute or two I paused. Or fir mai shikha aunty kai uper let gaya or unhone apne hath meri pith per rakh diya fir hum dono ek-dusare ko chumne lage rat kai 12:40 ho rhe thaiFir shikha aunty mere apne uper sai hata mujhe bistar per litaya or mere uper chad gayi fir mere hotho ko chusne lagi mai bhi unka sath dene laga fir mene apni jeebh unke muh mai daal di or vo mere hooth ko meri jeebh ko ek sath chusne lagi aasa 5 minute tak chala fir vo mere hotho ko chod mere gale ko chusne lagi fir dheere dheere meri chati ko. " I gave Wifey my best ingratiating smile while my eyes swivelled toward our neighbour. She’d taken her smartphone from her bag and a finger was sliding across the screen. "The party begins at Boogies,” she said, “and I'm sending you the address now. A nine o'clock reservation for drinks and dinner, and afterwards we'll see where the fun takes us. What's your phone number, Dan?" she asked, not even looking at me. I gave it to her and seconds later the WhatsApp notification appeared on my screen. "Touché," I said. "I think I will manage; though doubtless a certain part of my anatomy may show its appreciation of such a spectacle."That caused another outburst of laughter from the women. We continued the discussion for some time, but it seemed clear that both Lucy and my mother felt they could cope with most situations that might arise should they decide to go down that road. As a result I called a halt to the proceedings by summing up what we had decided."It seems to me that you both feel.
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