She was the source of all these poisonous thoughts, the crux, and I admit that I took joy in humiliating her. In making her cry and belittle herself, ... felt some sick sense of justice. Someone needed to pay for how I felt, and there was no one else.As I walked from her room, I was conflicted. I felt sick, and disgusted, and furious, but more than anything - much more than anything - I felt powerful.Doing what I did to Lexi exhilarated me. It filled me with the kind of adrenaline rush I’d only. Damn she was beautiful.“You must be new here.” She was already done with her apologies and had her books safely tucked between her arm and her body. Her body! And oh she had the brightest smile I had seen.“Yes Yes… I’m new; freshman” I said, laughing at my own joke.“I just knew I hadn’t seen you before here. It would be difficult not to notice you if you had been in the school.” She gave a slight smile, controlled and relaxed.“Why? Sorry… I’m just curious. Never mind answering. I just…” I tried. In the cafeteria I could hear a few kids in here eating, but it wasn’t as many I would have suspected if my floor had a group counselling session soon. I stuffed myself again and still no one had come to tell me to come back to the go to the session. When I was almost back to where I would have to surrender my pajamas, if I got them dirty, a nurse came to get me to take me to see a doctor.“David,” the doctor told me, “It seems that you are suffering a form of temporary blindness that we can’t. I was embarrassed and I was stuttering now. I didn’t know what to say, anyways she laughed it off and said you’re a young boy, it’s natural.This helped give me some confidence, I knew now that she knows I am attracted to her and she does not have a problem with it. Anyways, I took the medicine and left her room. Went to my room and slept for a bit as my headache was getting bad. The plan in the evening was for everyone to meet downstairs and then go for dinner and drinks at the hotel.
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