I’m such a spoil sport, sour grapes, wet blanket, you know all that. Screwed her plans for the boy toy all to hell. I decided to listen to the voice...ail she left after she tried calling a dozen times. She said, “Honey, I’m sorry you didn’t stay. Jay and I had a business lunch planned and would have been happy for you to join us. You would have been bored.” I texted her back saying, oh, I don’t think so Monica, I’m not into sharing or threesomes with uhhhh ... Jay, is it? Please use protection. ‘Who could be bothering us at this hour?’ Butternuts asks as he pops out from the shadows. He takes to the railing and starts sliding down it.‘What a dumbass,’ Penis Wrinkle says appearing beside the teenager.‘Wee!’ Butternuts shouts as he slides downward and right into the newel cap. Butternuts hits it hard, doubling over and falling off the end.Banana slug appears out of the shadows at the foot of the stairs laughing and pointing at the fallen gremlin. Anne can only shake her head as Penis. Her mouth was wide open. I could make out groans that sounded as if she was fighting a losing battle to curtail them. The phrase, “her eyes popped out of her head,” suddenly made sense to me in a way it never had before.Her body lurched, as if she’d fallen faint. She was almost lying on one side when she began to convulse, as if she were having a fit. I forced myself to look around. Incredibly the students hadn’t noticed a thing. I stepped towards the bench, only extinguishing the vibrations. The following day I contacted a lawyer regarding divorce procedures and what was required of me. The whole process of separation, counselling and hearing would take some two years before I was completely free of Sam. The first week staying at my brother’s place went by and was uneventful. While he was at work, I did the housework, tidied up, prepared the cooking and filled my time in well. It was now early May, 1997 and I was feeling down a bit when lying in bed. I fell asleep but had woken.
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